— sex therapy exercises
Flirting favorites
Flirting is just someone saying, “I like you.” There are countless ways to communicate that — and most couples have never actually told each other which ones land. This exercise fixes that.
← Back to all exercises— part one · do this individually first
What are your favorite ways of being told someone likes you?
Think about all the times people have flirted with you — not just your partner, but anyone. Which approaches felt best? A look, a compliment, a text, physical closeness, humor, effort? Write down what has landed for you.
Partner A — my favorites
Partner B — my favorites
After writing, share your lists. Remember how your partner understands or wants to be told that someone likes them — this is now your guide.
— part two · do this individually first
What are your favorite ways to tell someone you like them?
Think about how you naturally express interest or affection — with anyone, not just your partner. What do you do when you want someone to know you like them? Write it down.
Partner A — how I show I like someone
Partner B — how I show I like someone
After sharing, remember: when your partner does something from their list, they are telling you they like you — even if it would not be your preferred way of hearing it.
— the goal
Both of you will work on telling the other person that you like them — in the way they want to be told, using the ways you most naturally express it.
This is not about performing affection. It is about making sure the affection you already have is landing in a way your partner can actually feel.
Keep these lists somewhere accessible — refer back to them
— the exercise series
— want guided support?
These exercises work best with a therapist
If you are finding these exercises difficult to navigate on your own, therapy can help you work through the underlying dynamics at your own pace.
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