Best Sex Therapy Books To Promote Healing
Do It Yourself Sex Therapy
Making a list of the best sex therapy books took a while but I feel like I’ve created a treasure chest.
These books are my favorite books of all time. They will help you increase awareness and give you tools to change how you behave, feel, and relate to the people you love.
Some of these books aren’t related to sex therapy directly but have everything to do with understanding your sexual relationships as well as your relationship with yourself. Sexuality needs to be understood holistically to be effectively managed.
Sexual Desire
Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life
If you are having issues with mismatched desires or frustration regarding your partner’s lack of desire, this is a must-read.
Mating In Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic & the Domestic
This book will show you how to create more desire for your partner by creating more distance.
Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex
“This book has been so meaningful to me and has given me the words to describe my experience so much more eloquently that I could myself. I did not realize I was ace until I was in my 30s and even now it is something I’m coming to terms with talking about openly”
Relationships
More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory This book is more of a philosophical book about relationships. Don’t let the title scare you. It is also an excellent resource for navigating non-monogamy.
The Dance of Anger: A Woman’s Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships Understanding our relational patterns and the ways we cope with anger or distress is detrimental to relationship satisfaction
“In my opinion this is one of those books that everyone in a relationship should read, whether or not you have been affected by an affair. An eye-opener on the dynamics of love, desire and, well, relationships in and outside of the marriage – the book helps one to orient and not lose themselves in times of conflicts and uncertainty”
Therapeutic Interventions
ACT Made Simple: An Easy-to-Read Primer on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
You need to let go of shame for emotional peace and relational joy.
“Sue Johnson is the world’s leading expert on attachment theory and EFT. This book was written in 2020 so it is scientifically up to date. The author deconstructs the nature of adult attachment and implicitly explains the nature of emotion and behavior. Most of the valuable information is explicitly explained”
“This book is describing my life, my attachment cycles, my unhealthy behaviors, and how to break these cycles in order to better connect & relate with my spouse. A truly profound read”
“As a trauma survivor, and someone in recovery from DID, this book is proving to be so powerful for me. I have read very widely on trauma and have learned a little bit from many authors; but this book goes so much further because Fisher brings together understandings from neuroscience; together with learnings of Internal Family Systems Therapy, the Structural Dissociation model and Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, in a way that it’s all so applicable to my daily life”
“This book introduce concepts on communication that I’ve never heard or read anywhere else in my life. The principles will challenge you and introduce you to a whole world realizations once you learn. This is excellent for those who want to resolve conflicts, remove communication barriers, and get to know and understand people better. You will not regret buying this book and it is easy to digest while it still very much profound experiences”
“Anyone looking to discover and heal their inner child should get this book. It is eye-opening when you read it and it as if the book was written specifically for you. It also opens up your awareness discovering that there are so many that have been where you are and shared so many of the same experiences”
Trauma
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma If there is any trauma involved in your relationship, this book will help you understand what to do about it. I regularly recommend this book to my patients.
Sexuality
“One trans-woman’s reflections on sex after bottom surgery. She interviews other trans (post and pre-op) as well as some non-binary individuals about their sexual relationships, which brings some clarity to situations I had given little thought to. It must read if you are considering full transition.”
Sexual Abuse
The Sexual Healing Journey: A Guide for Survivors of Sexual Abuse
“This book has been a Godsend for me. If you follow all the recommendations with counseling, it will change your life. This is a MUST HAVE tool for those wishing to get their life back and learn to leave the past in the past and move forward.”
Addiction
“This book introduce concepts on communication that I’ve never heard or read anywhere else in my life. The principles will challenge you and introduce you to a whole world realizations once you learn. This is excellent for those who want to resolve conflicts, remove communication barriers, and get to know and understand people better. You will not regret buying this book and it is easy to digest while it still very much profound experiences”
